Monday, November 10, 2014

Build up a mom instead of tearing her down

As mothers, we should build each other up, not tear each other down. Today in church, I had to take Dakota into the “cry room” which is a wonderful place for parents to sit with their little ones that in some way may be disturbing the congregation. They want to play, they are tired and fussy, whatever. I walked in and saw a mom who I had seen before but hadn’t actually met. She introduced herself and her little one. She told me that she had three children total and also told me how she had fallen in the cry room last Sunday while holding her baby and how embarrassed she had been. I was talking to the little one, calling her the name the mom had said and after a few minutes the mom asked if she had told me that was the daughters’ name. I said yes and she responded with, “Oh my God, that is my two year olds name! You must think I am a terrible mother! First I tell you how I fell with the baby, then I tell you the wrong name!” I laughed it off and told her not to worry, I really didn’t think anything of it. I really admired her. She has three children, she looked great. Even if the weight of the world was on her shoulders, she carried herself amazingly. 

I honestly could of used that kindness from someone else. Being a mom is tough in itself. Being a mom with a full time job, plus a husband, plus family to visit, plus cooking and cleaning and still stuff piled on top of that is overwhelming to say the least. The discussion was a frozen lasagna, I LOVED them when I was pregnant and have rarely had them since but occasionally I don’t mind picking one up. I was told, “I NEVER served food like that. I ALWAYS make dinner fresh.” It really hurt my feelings the way it was said. Like I was doing something wrong for sometimes feeding my husband a frozen dinner. I am doing the absolute best I can. No, I don’t cook as much as I used to. After a month of my child not sleeping, it is all I can do to not go to bed at 7:30 with her. Is it not enough that I am damn near killing myself to do the things I am doing? Is it not enough that my weight has dropped 10 pounds from my pre-pregnancy size? Is it not enough that although I do not cook every night, my husband and baby are still happy and well taken care of? They have a clean home, clean clothes, food is in their bellies even if it is not always made from scratch and on top of it all they are both extremely loved by me. I rarely ask for assistance in anything I do, maybe that mom had more help or she didn’t mind going to sleep at midnight. I don't know but even now, weeks later, that comment still hurts me. 


I wish that person had been as kind hearted as I was to the mom at church. As moms we have the power to shape the future. Let us not bring the bearers of our future down. Let us build them up for a more powerful, positive influence on this world. Lord knows, we need it!

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